Jan 02

Hardware Store

When I was laid off in the last recession I would pick up my daughter and my friend’s son from preschool. My friend isn’t know for his mechanical expertise–he’s an amazing musician, but you do not want him working on your car. Or water heater. Or, well, anything that requires tools, which was good as he didn’t own any.

One morning I picked up the son and we headed over to True Value to pick up some parts to make a clothes rack.

“What’s this place?” he asked quizzically.

“True Value. It’s a hardware store.”

He furrowed his brow and and answered:

“I’ve never been here before!”

Dec 31

Quotable: Pat Carroll

Pat Carroll, describing her attitude toward her characterization of Ursula in The Little Mermaid:

“I (saw Ursula as this) ex-Shakespearean actress who now sold cars.”

via Jim Hill Media

Dec 29

Overheard: 9 yr old girl 4 days before Christmas

“Is it too late to be good?”

Dec 27

Quotable: Wayne Grudem

“Everything that looks different than the fires of hell is the result of common grace.”

Dec 25

Quotable: 72 yr old male

“She paid her way through Bob Jones by makin’ moonshine.”

Dec 22

Profound

I had never heard this word used as a verb until recently. I was in a small group discussing Facebook. Most of us mentioned that we tended to read posts from people who posted very little. One woman, whom I admire, said she skips posts where the same user is just reposting all of the stuff they had been surfing.

“I’m not going to take the time to read 12 things you’re gonna profound my day with.”

Dec 20

5 Years

As of the 5th of this month I have now been blogging for five years. It’s way longer than I expected. I started this thing after my TV went out and I was no longer able to play Elder Scrolls: Oblivion, and boredom really does breed creativity (I’m even thinking of throttling the house’s Netflix and internet usage).

I would still continue to maintain this blog if nobody read it–this was something I started for myself, I receive no income from it, and have never solicited pageviews.

But for both of you who still read it–thank you.

Dec 19

miskeymunication

Customer: My letters are typing numbers.

Me: Press the F-Lock key.

Customer: Where is it?

Me: It’s up on the top row with the Fn key

Customer: There’s a whole lotta f-in keys!

Dec 17

Overheard: 28 yr old mother of two girls

“Each one of you are grounded for just looking like an [redacted].”

Dec 02

hemiasinate

v., HEM-ee-ASS-uh-NATE, to do something poorly or shoddily as a result of a lack of care or effort.

I created this word to replace another word. You probably know the word I mean. The etymology of hemiasinate is meant to be a literal translation of that word, from the root words hemi, meaning half, and asinus, from the Latin word for donkey.

There appears to be only one existing word that concisely sums up the definition above.

I searched a long time to find another existing word that would express this concept, but all fall short. ‘Shoddy’ just doesn’t carry enough weight, and you can do your best and still do something shoddily. Besides, how would you verbify it? Shoddle? Shoddify makes it sound like something was previously done well and you made it shoddy.

Heather suggested ‘half-diddly-done,’ an homage to Ned Flanders’s tirade from the Simpsons episode Hurricane Neddy. However I feel it takes the sting out what the term should describe–kind of like calling suicide bombers ‘splodeydopes.’