Category: family

Trolling the Daughter

The Hunter

My daughter’s cat, Mr. Pucko, likes to kill things. He was so adorable when he killed his first bird that we wanted to commemorate it, so we made a little bird grave with a little bird tombstone. It seemed pretty funny at the time. Over the next couple of weeks he would bring back more …

Continue reading

What She Says, What She Means #1

“Are you stupid?”

That was what a mom asked one of her children while I was eating lunch. I don’t know if the child was stupid or not, but the mom was the one wearing skintight sweatpants out in public.

Quotable: Les Ollila

“If your wife comes home and the front end of the car is rearranged you have to decide, ‘Do I want a good car or a good marriage–you cannot have both at that point.”

Incompatible women & music

The first cassette tape I ever bought was the soundtrack to Phantom of the Opera (I already had a pirated version, but wanted the real thing). Sarah Brightman played Christine, and I loved her voice. Shortly after I bought this I started hanging around with Noodles. She did not think very much of Ms. Brightman’s …

Continue reading

Lustin’ for a bustin’

Remember back in the old days when gullible people would email you ridiculous urban legends without checking the facts? You know the ones I mean: out of context photo with plenty of JPEG compression artifacts, inaccurate descriptions, poor spelling, lots of all caps and exclamation points, and a story that just seems a wee bit …

Continue reading

Quotable: Jenny from Big Fish

“No, it’s logical if you think like your father. See, to him, there’s only two women: your mother and everyone else.”

Most loved and overlooked

Probably one of the gifts I most appreciate–and most take for granted–is a gift that is quite common in the 21st century United States. Most people have it, it is free, and it is available to all. In fact, it is even imposed on a good deal of people quite against their wills–as it was …

Continue reading

Happy Father’s Day

“One father is more than a hundred schoolmasters.” –English proverb