WOMAN1: Why don’t you use mascara? WOMAN2: Because I poke myself in the eye.
MadMania
Faith, Books, and Stuff
Tag: overheard
“Well, my grandma was evil.”
“You should see the cheese on my face right now!”
“I told my mom that I wanted to learn kite-fighting, but she was in the shower, and through the door she thought I said cockfighting, and she said, ‘Cockfighting is illegal in Missouri!’”
“My niece, she ain’t slow or nothin’, like artistic.”
“Could you hit me, like, right around Iowa?”
“I don’t think you have a huge butt.”
“I’m a big woman; I need a big inbox.”
“I ran into a girl online that I hadn’t seen since gradeschool. She asked me how I was doing. How do you sum up 50 years of your life in one sentence?” (pauses) “It sucks!”
“I hope no girls find me attractive when I’m in high school. I’m going to be a geek like my big brother; no girls try to date him.”