Category: humor

Overheard: 9 yr old girl 4 days before Christmas

“Is it too late to be good?”

Quotable: 72 yr old male

“She paid her way through Bob Jones by makin’ moonshine.”

miskeymunication

Customer: My letters are typing numbers. Me: Press the F-Lock key. Customer: Where is it? Me: It’s up on the top row with the Fn key Customer: There’s a whole lotta f-in keys!

Overheard: 28 yr old mother of two girls

“Each one of you are grounded for just looking like an [redacted].”

Another Irish Curse

“May the cat eat you, and may the devil eat the cat!”

Selfish

My wife is so selfish. She doesn’t take her phone with her when she gets out at 3am to go to the gym. Therefore I can’t text her to bring me donuts. I’m starving. My stomach is about to burst out of my middle like in that sci-fi movie with the aliens in it, the …

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Overheard: 60 yr old male

“When they cremate me I want to have a hat on.”

Quotable: D.A. Carson

“There’s no rulebook in Haddon Robinson’s ‘Homiletics’ that says, ‘Thou shalt preach the entire flipping book or thou shalt be damned.’”  

Quotable: Otto von Bismark

“They treat me like a fox, a cunning fellow (Schlaukopf) of the first rank. But the truth is that with a gentleman I am always a gentleman and a half, and when I have to do with a pirate, I try to be a pirate and a half.”

Bridges of Madison County: The Musical

The 1993 hit book The Bridges of Madison County is being made into a musical. For those of you who like music and stories about guys who sleep with other guys’ wives, this is your thing. My initial draft of this post contained a faux track list of song titles I made up to go …

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