MadMania

I have found that it is certainly much easier to write a list than to actually try to assemble words into sentences and sentences into words, so on that note:

The Top Ten Six Reasons why M. Night Shyamalan’s The Happening Is Terrible
(contains spoilers, but they aren’t as spoily as watching this movie)

1. Zooey Deschanel has only one expression.
2. Though an eight year-0ld child is one of the central characters, no-one around her including her father makes any attempt to shield her from the plethora of people committing suicide in grisly detail right in front of her.
3. The crazy old lady at the end of the movie served no purpose whatsoever.
4. While dozens of other people go through elaborate, calculated planning in order to commit suicide in the most painful way possible, the aforementioned crazy old lady tries to commit suicide by walking into a wall. Repeatedly.
5. Apparently plants don’t like nuclear power. They appear to be fine with hydroelectric power (which drowns vast acres of plants), coal (which causes acid rain), and solar (which creates amazing toxins in the photovoltaic cell creation process). But not nuclear power (which vents water into the air).
6. At the end of the movie when Mark Wahlberg and Zooey Deschanel walk outside despite the fact that not only are they possibly damning themselves to suicide, but they are also damning an eight year-old girl to the same fate.