Feb 2 2012

Not always a technical problem

madman

I was searching online for assistance with a Blackberry issue for work when I stumbled across this topic in a tech support forum:

yapping Not always a technical problem

 

 

 

I really have no idea why he posted this in a phone forum. Maybe he doesn’t actually want any assistance and he’s just venting.

The obvious solution is for him to tell his female to stop her yapping.

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Jan 30 2012

Mmm-bop

madman

Think about the lyrics, and you will realize that Mmm-bop is the unfunniest metaphor for death.

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Jan 27 2012

I’m just going to have to find myself a new giant

madman

André the Giant died 19 years ago today.

André was always one of my favorite wrestlers. When I was a kid, we didn’t watch wrestling at our house. Whenever we were at Grampa’s (my Dad’s dad), every Saturday morning was Bugs Bunny followed by, as Grampa called it, rasslin’. This was back in the early 80′s, with Hulk Hogan, Ricky the Dragon, Jake the Snake, King Kong Bundy, and of course, André.

The only match I remember was between King Kong Bundy and André the Giant.  Bundy was obviously the heel (villain), as evinced by his shaved head, his black unitard, and his being 500 lbs. He did a splash (jump from the top rope with arms and legs out, landing flat) on André like five times, breaking the giant’s sternum. I remember after the match when you saw André walking out, you could see his sternum pressing against his skin. I already thought KKB was bad, but to break a man’s sternum? Pure evil.

At least that’s the way I remember it. I’ve done some searching around online and found out that that was a kayfabe injury. In wrestling lingo, kayfabe means that whatever happens inside the ring is presented as real, but in real life it is not. Examples: The Undertaker is not really dead and Kane is not really his brother. In and out of the ring Vince McMahon really is a jerk, and Mick Foley really is hardcore. In wrestling lingo, a mark is a fan, and a smart mark is a fan who knows wrestling isn’t real. I was not a smart mark.

At any rate, I still don’t know how they did that sternum thing.

Anyway, celebrities die all the time (who doesn’t?), and it’s not like you actually know any of these people, but it was really sad when André died, like we really had lost the 8th Wonder of the World.

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Jan 25 2012

Quotable: Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade

madman

“You lost today, kid. But that doesn’t mean you have to like it.”

One of the best lines in Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade (or any movie of that matter). It’s what the lead tomb robber (played by Richard Young) said to Young Indy (River Phoenix) as he gifted him with what would become his trademark hat.

The character’s name is simply–Fedora.

The man he was working for? Panama Hat.

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Jan 22 2012

Quotable: Sam Duncan

madman

“From the day that you’re born
to the day you ride in the hearse
things are never so bad
that they couldn’t get worse.”

Sam Duncan was an African American educator in Higginsville, Missouri from the 1950s-1970s where he taught a number of classes and coached several sports. The high school’s football field is named in his honor.

Despite his wise and cynical advice and his years of teaching service, my own personal experience with Mr. Duncan was far less impressive. We were in American History–the first class that was really a challenge for me–and Mr. Duncan was subbing in for Mr. Pace. One of the preps that usually caused problems was whistling–just barely audibly, and just enough to be annoying. My friend Wilxn was sitting in front of him, and Mr. Duncan accused Wilxn of being the whistler. Wilxn--your semi-standard nerd who was almost always good in class–thought the situation was so absurd as to be humorous.

“It’s not me,” Wilxn said, smiling.

“Don’t get smart with me,” Mr. Duncan snapped at Wilxn. “I’ll take those glasses off of you and show you somethin’!”

Sadly, this only provided confirmation bias to what I felt about authority figures in general.

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